“Torn apart” is a metaphor that people use to describe difficult emotional states. In such moments, any connection with reality is lost, there is no contact with the body, and decisions are made at the level of instincts.

 

I know this state not from someone’s stories, but from my own experience. The ground shifts beneath your feet; you cannot pull yourself together; pillars that existed before no longer stand - a state of weightlessness. A moment comes when you must find the gravity back and return to your life. My return started with a banal question: do I want to live? It felt like a bucket of freezing water was thrown at me. Yes, I do. Without any doubts. So, the first I did was paint because that defines me, a part I didn’t acknowledge and recognize before. These were the most complicated but important steps towards myself and towards reclaiming my life.

 

This series is dedicated to the journey from despair to determination. As I gather myself piece by piece, I create paintings that I hope will illuminate the path like a lighthouse for those who are currently searching for their own way out of the darkness.